What is unshakable confidence? How do you acquire it? What do you rely on to give you confidence? Your skills? Your accomplishments? Have you ever thought to yourself “Who am I to do this______?” Have you thought “Lord, you picked the wrong person for this”
If we rely on ourselves, we will not be qualified for that which God calls us. Throughout Scripture we see God using people who felt unqualified for the task asked of them. The question shouldn’t be “How can I do this” but rather, “God, how are you going to do this through me”
The bible gives us affirmation after affirmation of God’s strength in the face of our limited ability:
“I can do all things through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13)
“Nothing is impossible with God” (Luke 1:37) ”
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9)
What brings me to today’s topic is the fact that I have felt defeated and lacking confidence. I hear Satans lies whispered around me and I continually have to catch myself and redirect my thoughts to positive things and quote scriptures; claiming the truth. The enemy’s goal has been to make me feel small and unable to focus on how mighty and powerful God is. It has worked. I had an anxiety attack on Tuesday night….
I had to be brought to the hospital for a final check from the surgeon. His daughter is graduating this weekend (I think I may have mentioned that in my earlier post) so he was leaving yesterday to travel. He wanted to check me over and give me the “ok” for travel home on Saturday. They sent a paramedic to pick me up; thank Heaven for that!! I had not sat down since my ride here to the condo upon my release after surgery. I spend my days laying on my side or on my stomach and when my sides ache, I stand for short periods of time. My ride here was fairly smooth due to the amount of meds they pumped me full of before I was released….well, I took my painkiller about half an hour before my ride to the hospital so that it would kick in before I would be required to sit. The paramedic was sympathetic to my condition and drove carefully (as carefully as bumpy Mexican streets allow). The ride was an excruciating 10 minutes!! The whole time I was waiting to see the doctor my mind was on the ride back to the condo. It consumed my mind like a thick, dark smoke! I felt like I could not think clearly or focus on anything else. The doctor called me in and redid my banadages again. He was very pleased with the way the wound was looking. He said it was almost dry (meaning the wound was hardly draining anymore) which was a good sign. He wrote up a note to give to my doctor requesting his assistance in the removal of my stitches at the appointed time. He had a little fun with the kids and shook all our hands and gave me a final hug and sent us off back to the condo.
My body was so exhausted from that little venture out. I was completely drained, feeling defeated and lacking confidence. In my own strength, I can accomplish nothing. My fears crippled me as I thought about the flight home on Saturday and how in the world I will survive it! I need to ask myself the question “God, how are you going to do this” instead of “How am I going to do this”
The Psalmist writes “Who, O God, is like you? Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honour and comfort me once again” (Psalm 71:20,21) and I believe that! I wanted this surgery for the relief of my daily, chronic pain and I believe that God is with me every single step of the way. He will restore my strength and comfort me in the hard days.
Saturday will be a hard day, if I’ve ever lived through one, but I will not stop praying about it. By Gods mighty power and strength I will be able to withstand the wait in the airport and the long flight home. I know it will be a long day. It will be a testing of my faith too, but God is with me. The members of my support group on Facebook are already covering me in prayer in the anticipation of the upcoming flight, and I really appreciate it. They have been an awesome source of comfort and knowledge in my recovery so far.
So, as a final word of encouragement, God is with you! He will be your strength and confidence in whatever situation you are asked to walk through. You don’t walk the path alone. Sometimes He walks beside you, while other times He carries you. Let him. Invite him. Without God, you will lack confidence and strength! Without God, the path will seem dark and never-ending. Lay your burdens on him so he can give you rest.
Let Christ BE your unshakable confidence!